This Is Forever Read online

  “Yeah, if we wanted to make it to the rink by eight, we had to take the six o’clock bus,” she says, and we walk over to the truck.

  “Why don’t you get him into the SUV, and I’ll put his bag in the trunk?” I say, and she opens the back door.

  I close the trunk at the same time she closes the back door. “Are you okay?” I ask as she just stands there.

  “Seriously, what are you doing here?” she asks, standing in front of me, and the wind picks up and some of the loose hair flies into her face.

  “I,” I start, but I don’t even know why I am here. “Listen, you need a lift, and there was no way you would have taken it had I asked.”

  “So you just show up here?” She looks around at the traffic of people coming our way.

  “Answer me this.” I look at her, and I suddenly want to step closer to her. “Had I called you and offered you one, would you have taken me up on my offer?”

  She doesn’t hesitate for even a second. “No,” she says. “You had to go out of your way yesterday to drive me home, so I wasn’t going to let you do it again today.”

  I’m about to argue with her when the back door opens. “Mom, I’m hungry.”

  “What are you in the mood for, buddy?” I ask him.

  Without missing a beat, he just blurts out, “Pancakes, waffles, eggs, and some bread.” I look at Caroline, and I want to put my hand on her neck and bring her close to me and kiss her, but instead, I just shake my head.

  “I think we should get him fed before he adds lobster to that list.” I see the worry set into her eyes, and I know she’s probably thinking about paying the bill.

  “I owe you breakfast,” I say. “It’s on me.”

  “How do you figure you owe me breakfast?” she asks.

  “You’re letting me take you, and you aren’t giving me a hard time about it,” I say. “So thank you.” I nod at her. “Now get in. I’m hungry, too.” I turn and walk to the driver’s side, and I don’t even realize that I’m holding my breath, waiting for her to get in the SUV. She gets in and then shakes her head. “Are we all ready?” I ask. Looking behind me, I see as Dylan nods his head to me.

  Pulling away from the curb, I make my way to the arena, stopping at a diner halfway there. I get out, and when I walk around, Caroline is already getting Dylan out of the vehicle. It looks like she is telling him something, and he just nods his head at her. “Everything okay?”

  “Yes,” she says, and I look at Dylan who just nods.

  We walk up to the entrance, and the bells on the door ring as soon as I pull it open. “Sit where you want,” the older white-haired lady says, rushing from behind the counter to the back.

  “Pick a seat,” I tell them, and Caroline walks in front of me to a booth along the window. She waits for Dylan to climb into the booth and then follows him in, and I sit in front of them. I grab the menus tucked behind the salt and pepper shakers, handing one to Dylan and then one to Caroline. Then I look down at my own.

  The lady who told us to sit comes over with three glasses of water. “Hey there, what can I get for you?” I look at Caroline to go first.

  “Um,” she starts to talk and then looks down at the menu, and I see her eyes roaming over the menu.

  “I can order first,” I tell the lady who holds the pad in one hand and the pen in the other. “I’ll take pancakes, waffles, two eggs over easy, two eggs scrambled, some hash browns, six orders of toast, and three orange juices.” The lady just rolls her lips, trying not to laugh, and I look up at her. “Just put the plates in the middle, and we can all share.”

  “Got it,” she says, and then looks at Caroline. “Did you want to add some fruit with that?” Caroline just shakes her head. “Coming right up.”

  “Do you know how much food you just ordered?” Caroline leans over the table and directs her question at me, but her voice is louder than she intended.

  “Well, you took too long, so I ordered for us,” I say, grabbing the water and taking a sip, my mouth suddenly dry.

  “Can we talk?” Caroline says. “Outside.” She gets up. “Honey, I’ll be right outside.”

  “Okay, Mom,” he says.

  I smile at him. “Don’t eat all that food before I come back.” He smiles back and shrugs. I follow Caroline outside, ignoring the fact that the yoga pants mold her ass like a second skin and should be worn with a long shirt to cover it. I wonder to myself if I have a jacket in the car, and then I almost stop in my tracks. What is happening to me? I don’t have time to think about it because we are outside in front of the window, and she looks in to see if Dylan is okay.

  “I can’t afford to pay for this meal,” she says, her head held high and her shoulders back. “There is no way I can even imagine what that bill will be, but …”

  I hold up my hand to stop her from talking. “When did I ask you to pay for anything?”

  “I can’t afford to pay this. Not now”—she talks faster now—“not next week, not even next month. I am not a charity case.”

  “Are you done?” I ask and wait for her to indicate she is listening. I step into her space, and she takes one step back, which pisses me off to no avail. Suddenly, I want to sit her down, and I want her to tell me everything. I want to know everything about her, but something says to tread lightly. “I’m not doing it for charity, and I don’t expect you to pay me back. Not this week, not next week, not even next year. I don’t know your story, Caroline, and I’m not even sure you would tell me, but I want you to listen and to pay attention to the words I’m about to say. I’m doing this because I want to and because I can. I’m doing this because sometimes people come into your life for certain reasons. I don’t always know what that reason is, but I know that I want to be your friend, Caroline. And as your friend, this is what people do.”

  “I don’t have many friends,” she says, and I smile. “I mean, if you think about it, I probably have maybe one friend. But she’s more of an acquaintance.”

  “Well, I’m happy I’m your first.” I try to make a joke but see that her eyes are filling with tears, and it kills me to see her cry. “Don’t,” I say softly, and my hand flies out to touch her face and catch the tear that falls out of her eye. “Don’t cry.” Her skin is soft like silk, and I want nothing more than to pull her to me.

  “I’m not crying,” she says and steps out of my grasp. “It’s just I usually do things on my own.”

  “Yeah, I can see that,” I say, then look in and see that the waitress is there with the food. “It doesn’t make you less of a person to accept help. Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty sure that kid can eat everything I ordered, so I think we should go in and make sure he doesn’t.” I walk away, and when my hand touches the door handle, she speaks.

  “Thank you,” she says softly, and I turn back to see her standing there with her hands in front of her. “I don’t know what your reason is, but I want to just say thank you.”

  “You’re welcome, Caroline,” I say to her softly, and my heart speeds up. This tiny woman who comes at me with guns blazing and ready to go to war doesn’t even know how much she is worth.

  Chapter Six

  Caroline

  “Thank you.” It’s the only thing I can say to him. My heart is beating so fast I can’t even focus on anything else. From the minute I saw him standing there waiting for us, my knees have been shaky. I didn’t know what he was doing, and I have no idea what’s going on. It’s just too much.

  “Let’s go eat,” he says, and I have to stop looking at him because all it does is make me want something I can’t have. He holds the door open for me, and I walk in with him following, and he is not wrong. Dylan is already eating one waffle and is grabbing a pancake to add to his plate. The syrup is already in front of him, and there is syrup on his plate.

  “I was going to wait,” he says to me with his cheek full of food as he takes another bite. It looks like he hasn’t eaten in a month.

  “Oh, I forgot to order bacon and sa
usage,” Justin says, sitting down on his side of the table. He holds up his hand, and the sleeve rises and shows his arm muscle, and I suddenly wonder how many people got lost in those arms. Is he with someone right now? Did he have to sneak out to come and pick us up, or did he tell her all about the poor lady with the kid whose car broke down? “Can we get some bacon and sausage?”

  “Coming right up,” the waitress says, and I look at the full plates of food on the table. I don’t even know what to eat first when I hear him.

  “Eat.” Justin’s voice makes me look at him, and I roll my eyes, taking my empty plate and filling it with some scrambled eggs and then a slice of toast. The waitress comes over and adds two more plates to the table. “Meat,” he says, grabbing the plate of bacon and putting some on my plate and then on Dylan’s. “Have some sausage,” he says, putting two on my plate and then two on Dylan’s, who just nods his head and eats another pancake.

  I pick my fork up and scoop up some eggs, and they melt in my mouth. We rarely, and by that, I mean never, go out and eat. So this little diner is everything. “Are we going to be on the ice again today?” Dylan asks Justin, who is eating from his own huge plate. Between the two of them, there is barely any food left, and I eat the little I have slowly so Dylan can get the rest if he wants it.

  “Yeah,” Justin says, drinking his orange juice. “We are making new groups today. After the evaluations yesterday, we are going to make new groups every week,” he says. “And there is a special surprise today.”

  I look over at Dylan and see that his eyes are as big as saucers. “More surprises?” He looks at me and then at Justin. “What is it?”

  “I can’t tell you that.” Justin smiles at him and takes the last drink of his juice and then looks at me. “Did you eat enough?”

  “Yeah,” I say, looking down at my empty plate. I don’t grab the last piece of toast, and it’s a good thing because Dylan snatches it up and then turns to me.

  “Can you put peanut butter on this?” he asks, and I lean over to grab a small square plastic container, then peel the top off and spread it on the toast. “Thanks, Mom,” he says as he bites into it.

  The waitress comes over. “Well, I take it the food was good?” She stacks the empty plates to clear the table, and I smile at her. When she walks away, Justin gets up and follows her, and I know he’s going to pay the bill. I’m trying not to think about how much it is, but I can’t help it. When I pulled out the menu, my heart sank at the prices. The lowest was six dollars for the two eggs plate. I grab the menu now and try to do a quick calculation in my head, but my mind starts to spin when I get past the fifty-dollar mark.

  “Did you eat good?” I ask Dylan, grabbing my own orange juice and drinking it while he nods and finishes his toast. Justin comes back over and sits down in front of us.

  “You are going to be a bullet on the ice today,” Justin tells Dylan. “My father used to make me eat the biggest breakfast in the morning,” he says. “I used to hate it.” He shakes his head. “All I wanted was to get on the ice.”

  “I like the ice the best,” Dylan says.

  “One day, I didn’t eat breakfast, and I went on the ice. I couldn’t even skate,” Justin says, and Dylan just listens to his story.

  “What happened?” Dylan asks, all worried.

  “Well, I went to skate, and then I was going on a breakaway, but I just didn’t have the energy to skate it all the way to the goal line, and they stole the puck from me.”

  “Was your dad mad?” he asks, worried for him. “Did he yell at you?”

  “Nah, my dad never yells at me. My mom sometimes.” He smiles and looks at me. “Most times. Are you guys almost ready?” he asks, and Dylan nods.

  “You need to go wash your hands and mouth before we leave,” I say, seeing the peanut butter across his cheek. Looking down at the syrup drops on the table, I bet he has some of that on him as well. I get out of the booth, and I’m about to go with him when Justin gets up.

  “I don’t think you have the parts that belong in the men’s bathroom. I have it,” he says. I stand here with my mouth open as they walk away, and I sit back down, not sure what else to do. He’s been around me for a day, and my whole world feels like it’s shifted.

  Sitting here, I wait for them to come back out, and when they do, Dylan is laughing at something Justin just said. “Ready?” I say, getting out of the booth. Justin looks over my head at the waitress, who nods at him, and he walks past me, grabbing a brown to-go bag.

  “Is that your lunch?” Dylan asks him, and Justin just smiles at him. Opening the door, Justin gestures for me walk out before him. He opens the door for Dylan and makes sure he’s seated and buckled, and I get in, looking in the back.

  Justin gets in and starts the vehicle, pulling off and making his way to the arena. “All the papers are in the glove compartment,” he starts saying to me, and I shake my head. “I have AAA in case something happens,” he says, pulling into the parking spot, “but I want you to call me and then call them.”

  “I can’t believe I’m doing this,” I say, and I have to be honest. I have no choice. My boss at the call center is amazing, but he can only do so much, and me missing work and leaving early is something he is already covering for me. Because of hockey camp, I’m arriving late this whole summer.

  I get out of the car the same time as Justin and then Dylan, and Justin hands me the keys like it’s nothing. “Let’s go get the surprise,” Justin says, and Dylan skips beside him.

  I walk beside them while Dylan asks questions, and Justin opens the door and waits for me to walk in. Dylan walks up to the lady who greeted us yesterday.

  “Good morning, Dylan,” she says with a smile and then looks at me. “Good morning.” Then she must see Justin behind me. “Morning, Justin.”

  “Hi, Malika,” I say, smiling and putting my hands on Dylan’s shoulders.

  “We have a special surprise today,” Malika says, and Dylan jumps up and claps his hands.

  “I’ll take them there,” Justin says, and she just smiles.

  “Have a great day, guys,” she says while Dylan follows Justin around the staircase. When we get to the hallway, he turns and walks into the first room. Stopping at the door, I see tables against all four walls with equipment on it.

  “Grab one of the bags,” Justin says to Dylan, gesturing to the stack of empty blue hockey bags in the corner. “Now let’s fill up the bag.”

  “What?” Dylan asks, looking at him.

  “You need a chest protector,” he says, going over to the table and grabbing one, and another man comes in the room.

  “Hey, there he is,” a man says, coming up to Justin.

  “Dan,” he says, holding out his hand. “So glad you could make this happen.”

  “When Justin Stone calls, I come running,” he says, and I just watch him in action. “Who is this one?’

  “Dylan Woods,” Justin says. “His mother, Caroline.”

  “Dylan, let’s get you geared up,” the man says, grabbing Dylan and bringing him over to get him elbow pads. I have to wipe away a tear, and when Justin looks at me, I look down and try not to let him see. He’s never had new equipment before. He’s never had anything that was brand new and his own. Everything from his clothes to his shoes have always been secondhand.

  “I have to go,” I say to the floor and walk around him to Dylan. “I’ll see you tonight.”

  Turning, I start to walk out of the room and then remember Justin needs to get his lunch, but when I turn around, I run smack into his hard chest. I know it’s him because it smells exactly like him. His hands catch my arms to steady me, and I breathe in and out, which makes it worse since now his smell is all around me.

  “Um,” I start to say, and then I look up, and his brown eyes are dark with just a little gold on the inside. “You forgot your lunch,” I say softly, and he smiles a big megawatt smile. It’s a smile that lights up his whole face like you would when you win a race or, in his case, win som
e cup.

  “It’s not my lunch,” he says, his voice soft. “I figured you didn’t pack yourself a lunch.” I’m about to ask him what he’s talking about, but then I hear a female voice calling his name.

  “Justin, there you are.” I step out of his hold and take two steps back, looking over and seeing the woman from yesterday. This time, she’s dressed in black pants and the nicest top I’ve ever seen, and her hair is perfectly set. She walks like she owns the world, and it takes one second for me to realize that these two fit. This is who he’ll end up with, so it’s only logical that she would fit.

  “I’ll be back tonight,” I say and make a beeline for the exit. I walk a little bit faster than normal out into the hot sun. Getting into the car, I smell him all around me. I adjust my seat and make my way to work. The SUV drives so smooth. I have no idea what to do with the radio or what button to press, so I just leave it off and get lost in my own thoughts, which go right back to Justin where they shouldn’t be.

  Chapter Seven

  Justin

  “Great idea to get the kids new equipment,” Amy says. “Some of them have equipment that needs to be retired.” I look at her, and I’m almost tempted to fire her, but then who the hell would help run this shit.

  “Have some respect, Amy,” I say under my breath as kids run out of the room like it’s Christmas morning. I walk in, looking for Dylan, but don’t see him anywhere.

  “He went to his locker room,” Dan says while he helps a kid try on skates.

  “Thank you so much.” One of the fathers comes to me and shakes my hand with his eyes filled with tears. “It’s more than you know.”

  “It’s my pleasure,” I say, and then I point over at Dan. “He’s the one who made this happen.”

  “Your parents should be very, very proud,” he says, and I smile.

  I lean in and whisper, “I’ll remind my mother of that the next time I miss her curfew when I’m home.”